Personality Isn't Permanent

1. Personality is not fixed: You can intentionally shape who you become

"Human beings are works in progress that mistakenly think they're finished."

Personality is malleable. Contrary to popular belief, personality is not innate or unchangeable. It is shaped by our goals, experiences, and environment. Research shows that people's personalities change significantly over time, even without conscious effort. By understanding this, we can take an active role in shaping who we become.

Intentional change is possible. Through goal-setting, sustained effort, and environmental design, we can intentionally change our personality traits. This includes:

• Openness to new experiences
• Conscientiousness
• Extraversion
• Agreeableness
• Emotional stability (neuroticism)

By focusing on developing desired traits and behaviors, we can become the person we want to be, rather than being limited by our past or current self-perception.

2. Your future self should guide your present identity and actions

"Always make your future bigger than your past."

Envision your ideal future self. Instead of being defined by your past, focus on who you want to become. Create a vivid, detailed vision of your future self, including:

• Daily routines
• Achievements
• Relationships
• Values and beliefs
• Skills and knowledge

Act from your future self's perspective. Once you have a clear vision, use it as a filter for your present decisions and actions. Ask yourself:

• What would my future self do in this situation?
• Is this choice aligned with becoming my desired future self?
• How can I bridge the gap between my current and future self?

By consistently acting from your future self's perspective, you'll naturally evolve into that person over time.

3. Trauma shapes personality, but can be transformed through reframing

"Trauma is not what happens to us, but what we hold inside in the absence of an empathetic witness."

Understand trauma's impact. Trauma, both big and small, can significantly shape our personality and limit our potential. It often leads to:

• Fixed mindsets
• Avoidance behaviors
• Emotional rigidity
• Limited imagination and goals

Transform trauma through reframing. To overcome trauma's effects:

1. Seek empathetic witnesses to share your experiences
2. Practice emotional regulation and psychological flexibility
3. Reframe past events as happening "for you" rather than "to you"
4. Use journaling to process emotions and gain new perspectives
5. Engage in experiences that challenge your trauma-based beliefs

By actively working to transform trauma, you can unlock new possibilities for personal growth and change.

4. Your narrative determines your reality: Shift from past to future focus

"We see the world, not as it is, but as we are."

Recognize the power of narrative. The stories we tell about ourselves shape our identity, behavior, and outcomes. Most people's narratives are rooted in their past, limiting their potential for growth and change.

Shift to a future-focused narrative. To create a more empowering story:

1. Reframe past experiences to emphasize growth and learning
2. Focus on your desired future self and outcomes
3. Use "strategic remembering" to reinforce positive aspects of your past
4. Practice telling your story from your future self's perspective
5. Regularly update your narrative as you grow and change

By consciously crafting a future-focused narrative, you create a powerful tool for personal transformation and goal achievement.

5. The subconscious mind is physical: Change it to change your personality

"A cell is a machine for turning experience into biology."

Understand the physical nature of the subconscious. Our memories, emotions, and habits are stored in our physical body. This means that changing our personality requires changing our biology.

Strategies to change your subconscious:

1. Practice fasting to reset your body and mind
2. Engage in regular charitable giving to expand your self-concept
3. Create peak experiences that challenge your current identity
4. Use visualization and affirmations to program new beliefs
5. Engage in physical activities that embody your desired traits

By recognizing the physical nature of the subconscious and actively working to change it, you can accelerate your personal transformation and create lasting change.

6. Environment powerfully influences personality: Design it strategically

"If we do not create and control our environment, our environment creates and controls us."

Recognize environmental impact. Our surroundings, including physical spaces, social groups, and information inputs, significantly shape our personality and behavior. Most people passively accept their environment, letting it dictate who they become.

Strategically design your environment. To support your desired future self:

1. Surround yourself with people who embody your aspirations
2. Create physical spaces that reflect and reinforce your goals
3. Curate your information diet to support your growth
4. Use visual cues and reminders of your desired future self
5. Eliminate or minimize environmental factors that hinder your progress

By actively shaping your environment, you create a powerful support system for becoming your ideal future self.

7. Embrace discomfort and new experiences to foster personal growth

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."

Seek novelty and challenge. Personal growth often requires stepping outside your comfort zone. Embrace new experiences, roles, and challenges to expand your capabilities and self-perception.

Strategies for embracing discomfort:

1. Regularly do things for the first time
2. Take on roles that challenge your current identity
3. Travel to new places and immerse yourself in different cultures
4. Learn new skills, especially those outside your current strengths
5. Engage in activities that push your physical and mental limits

By consistently embracing discomfort and new experiences, you create opportunities for rapid personal growth and transformation.

8. Commit fully to your goals to overcome decision fatigue

"It's easier to hold to your principles 100 percent of the time than it is to hold to them 98 percent of the time."

Understand decision fatigue. Constantly weighing options and making choices depletes our willpower and leads to poor decisions. This can hinder personal growth and goal achievement.

Make committed decisions. To overcome decision fatigue:

1. Clearly define your goals and priorities
2. Make firm decisions about key areas of your life
3. Create rules and systems that automate decision-making
4. Eliminate or minimize trivial choices
5. Regularly review and recommit to your decisions

By making committed decisions and reducing decision fatigue, you free up mental energy for personal growth and high-level thinking.

9. Use strategic remembering and ignorance to support your desired self

"What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we begin from."

Practice strategic remembering. Consciously choose what to focus on from your past to support your future self. This includes:

• Emphasizing growth experiences
• Reframing challenges as learning opportunities
• Celebrating past successes that align with your future goals

Implement strategic ignorance. Deliberately avoid information and influences that don't support your desired future self. This may include:

• Limiting exposure to negative news or media
• Avoiding comparison with others on social media
• Declining opportunities that don't align with your goals

By carefully curating your mental inputs, you create a supportive internal environment for personal growth and transformation.

10. Implement forcing functions to accelerate personal transformation

"The ability of the average man could be doubled if it were demanded. If the situation demanded."

Understand forcing functions. These are situations or constraints that compel you to take specific actions or produce results. They can be powerful tools for personal growth and goal achievement.

Implement forcing functions in your life:

1. Set public deadlines for important goals
2. Make financial investments in your desired outcomes
3. Create accountability partnerships or groups
4. Put yourself in high-stakes situations that require growth
5. Use time constraints to boost productivity and focus

By strategically using forcing functions, you create external pressures that support your internal desires for change, accelerating your personal transformation.

Last updated: July 17, 2024