Dropping the Struggle

1. Embrace the present moment and drop the struggle with life

You can't try not to try, because letting go is not in the conscious mind's repertoire. But you can allow it.

Surrender to what is. Life often unfolds in unexpected ways, challenging our expectations and desires. Instead of resisting these challenges, we can choose to embrace them. This doesn't mean giving up or becoming passive, but rather accepting the reality of our current situation without judgment.

Practice mindful awareness. By cultivating presence and awareness in our daily lives, we can learn to respond to situations with clarity and wisdom rather than reacting from habitual patterns. This might involve:

• Pausing before responding to difficult situations
• Taking deep breaths to center ourselves
• Observing our thoughts and emotions without getting caught up in them

Find peace in acceptance. When we stop struggling against reality, we open ourselves to new possibilities and insights. This shift in perspective can lead to:

• Reduced stress and anxiety
• Increased resilience in the face of adversity
• Greater creativity and problem-solving abilities

2. Recognize the perfection in imperfection

We are perfect as we are when we can acknowledge that our imperfections, whatever they may be, are part of the larger picture of who we are.

Embrace human fallibility. Striving for perfection often leads to frustration and disappointment. By accepting our flaws and limitations, we can cultivate self-compassion and growth.

Find beauty in the imperfect. The Japanese concept of wabi-sabi celebrates the beauty of imperfection, incompleteness, and impermanence. Applying this perspective to our lives can help us:

• Appreciate the unique qualities that make us who we are
• Let go of unrealistic expectations
• Find contentment in the present moment

Use imperfections as opportunities. Our flaws and mistakes can be valuable teachers if we approach them with curiosity and openness. By reframing our perceived shortcomings, we can:

• Learn valuable lessons from our failures
• Develop resilience and adaptability
• Cultivate humility and empathy for others

3. Find meaning in being rather than doing

If we are fully immersed in the present, aware of the life streaming through our body, then life is so meaningful that the question of meaning and purpose doesn't even arise.

Shift from achievement to presence. Our culture often equates meaning with accomplishments and external validation. However, true fulfillment comes from being fully present in each moment, regardless of what we're doing.

Cultivate inner stillness. By developing a regular practice of meditation or mindfulness, we can learn to access the deep sense of peace and contentment that exists beneath our busy thoughts and activities. This might involve:

• Setting aside time each day for quiet reflection
• Practicing mindful breathing throughout the day
• Engaging in activities that bring us into a state of flow

Find purpose in everyday moments. Instead of constantly striving for some future goal, we can find meaning and purpose in the simple acts of daily life:

• Savoring a meal with full attention
• Truly listening to a friend or loved one
• Appreciating the beauty of nature around us

4. Love yourself first to truly love others

We are the ones we are looking for. We are the beloved.

Cultivate self-compassion. True love for others begins with a deep acceptance and care for ourselves. This doesn't mean being selfish or narcissistic, but rather developing a healthy relationship with our own thoughts, emotions, and experiences.

Practice self-care. Taking care of our physical, emotional, and spiritual needs is essential for maintaining healthy relationships with others. This might include:

• Setting healthy boundaries
• Engaging in activities that bring us joy and relaxation
• Seeking support when needed

Recognize interconnectedness. As we develop a loving relationship with ourselves, we naturally become more open and compassionate towards others. This shift in perspective allows us to:

• See the shared humanity in all people
• Respond to others with empathy and understanding
• Create deeper, more authentic connections

5. Live in both timeless presence and clock time

The great work of being human is to live in the worlds of stillness and movement, time and timelessness, at one and the same time.

Balance being and doing. While it's important to be present and aware, we also need to engage with the practical aspects of life that require planning and action. Finding a balance between these two modes allows us to live more fully and effectively.

Cultivate timeless awareness. Practices like meditation and mindfulness can help us access a sense of timeless presence, even as we go about our daily activities. This might involve:

• Taking regular breaks to center ourselves
• Practicing mindfulness during routine tasks
• Developing a sense of spaciousness around our thoughts and activities

Use time wisely. When we're grounded in timeless awareness, we can engage with clock time more efficiently and purposefully. This allows us to:

• Prioritize what's truly important
• Let go of unnecessary stress and hurry
• Find a sense of flow in our work and activities

6. Accept change as the only constant

Want the change. Be inspired by the flame / Where everything shines as it disappears.

Embrace impermanence. Everything in life is constantly changing, including ourselves. By accepting this fundamental truth, we can let go of our attachment to fixed outcomes and open ourselves to new possibilities.

Find beauty in transience. The fleeting nature of life can actually enhance its beauty and preciousness. By cultivating this perspective, we can:

• Appreciate each moment more fully
• Let go of regrets about the past
• Worry less about an uncertain future

Develop resilience. When we accept change as a natural part of life, we become more adaptable and resilient in the face of challenges. This might involve:

• Developing a growth mindset
• Practicing flexibility in our plans and expectations
• Finding opportunities for learning and growth in difficult situations

7. Cultivate knowing beyond thinking

Being just knows; it doesn't know this or that, but its inherent nature is knowing.

Access intuitive wisdom. Beyond our analytical thinking lies a deeper form of knowing that arises from our innate connection to life. By learning to trust this intuitive wisdom, we can navigate life with greater ease and clarity.

Practice open awareness. Developing a sense of spacious, non-judgmental awareness allows us to tap into this deeper knowing. This might involve:

• Regular meditation or contemplative practices
• Spending time in nature
• Engaging in creative activities that bypass our analytical mind

Trust the process of life. When we let go of our need to control and figure everything out, we open ourselves to the inherent intelligence of life itself. This trust allows us to:

• Make decisions with greater confidence
• Navigate uncertainty with grace
• Experience a deeper sense of peace and alignment with life

Last updated: October 23, 2024