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101 Things Your Dad Never Told You About Men

101 Things Your Dad Never Told You About Men

The Good, Bad, And Ugly Things Men Want And Think About Women And Relationships
by Bruce Bryans 2015 102 pages
3.82
100+ ratings
Self Help
Relationships
Love
Listen
8 minutes

Key Takeaways

1. Men crave respect and understanding above all else

"Men need respect the way women need love."

Respect is fundamental. Men deeply desire to be understood and respected by their partners. This goes beyond mere admiration; it's about recognizing his efforts, valuing his opinions, and acknowledging his strengths. When a woman shows genuine respect, it creates a strong foundation for love and commitment.

Understanding his needs. Men often have different emotional needs than women. They may require:

  • Space to process emotions
  • Time for personal interests and friendships
  • Recognition for their accomplishments
  • Support in pursuing their goals

By making an effort to understand and meet these needs, a woman can forge a deep emotional connection with her partner.

2. Appreciate his efforts and support his goals

"Always consider and appreciate how hard he works to be a good man."

Genuine appreciation matters. Men thrive on feeling valued for their efforts, both big and small. Taking notice of the things he does to contribute to the relationship and expressing sincere gratitude can significantly boost his confidence and motivation to continue investing in the partnership.

Be his cheerleader. Supporting a man's goals and ambitions is crucial for his self-esteem and overall happiness. This involves:

  • Showing interest in his work or passions
  • Encouraging him to pursue his dreams
  • Offering emotional support during challenges
  • Celebrating his successes, no matter how small

By being his biggest supporter, a woman becomes an invaluable partner in his life journey.

3. Communicate with clarity, honesty, and kindness

"No man wants to play 'guess what I'm upset about right now?' with his woman."

Direct communication is key. Men generally prefer straightforward communication over subtle hints or guessing games. When expressing needs, concerns, or desires, it's important to be clear and specific. This approach helps avoid misunderstandings and frustration on both sides.

Kindness in delivery. While honesty is crucial, the manner in which information is conveyed matters greatly. Aim to:

  • Use "I" statements to express feelings
  • Avoid accusatory language
  • Choose appropriate timing for serious discussions
  • Balance criticism with positive feedback

By communicating with both clarity and kindness, a woman can foster open, productive dialogue in the relationship.

4. Balance independence with nurturing his needs

"Don't make a man compete with your friends if he's genuinely interested in forming a long-term commitment with you."

Maintain your identity. Independence is attractive, but it's important to strike a balance. While pursuing personal interests and maintaining friendships is healthy, make sure your partner doesn't feel neglected or secondary in your life.

Nurture the relationship. Prioritizing your partner doesn't mean losing yourself. It involves:

  • Making quality time for each other
  • Showing interest in his life and concerns
  • Being attentive when spending time together
  • Integrating him into your social circle when appropriate

By balancing personal independence with nurturing the relationship, you create a strong, interdependent partnership.

5. Cultivate feminine grace and natural beauty

"Men love women that dress sexy and lust for women that dress slutty. There is a difference."

Embrace femininity. Many men are attracted to women who embrace their feminine qualities. This doesn't mean conforming to stereotypes, but rather feeling confident in expressing your natural feminine energy through your appearance, mannerisms, and interactions.

Natural beauty shines. While grooming and presentation matter, most men appreciate a woman's natural beauty. Consider:

  • Using makeup to enhance rather than mask features
  • Dressing in a way that makes you feel confident and comfortable
  • Focusing on overall health and well-being
  • Cultivating inner qualities like kindness and grace

By embracing your authentic self and feminine energy, you become naturally attractive to high-quality men.

6. Master the art of physical intimacy

"Men love it when their wives initiate sex."

Be sexually assertive. Taking initiative in the bedroom can significantly boost a man's confidence and desire. It communicates that you find him attractive and desire him, which is immensely flattering and arousing for most men.

Cultivate intimacy beyond sex. While physical connection is important, true intimacy encompasses more:

  • Engage in non-sexual touch and affection
  • Create a comfortable environment for vulnerability
  • Communicate openly about desires and boundaries
  • Explore new ways to connect emotionally and physically

By mastering both physical and emotional intimacy, you create a deeply satisfying and passionate relationship.

7. Choose wisely and challenge fairly in relationships

"On the quest to find the perfect girl, men love an exciting, but fair challenge."

Select compatible partners. Choose a man whose values, goals, and lifestyle align with yours. Look for qualities that indicate long-term potential, such as emotional maturity, respect for others, and shared life visions.

Maintain healthy challenge. Men often enjoy pursuing a woman who:

  • Has her own interests and passions
  • Maintains high standards for herself and others
  • Offers intellectual and emotional stimulation
  • Respects herself and expects respect in return

By choosing wisely and maintaining a healthy level of challenge, you create a dynamic and fulfilling relationship that continues to grow over time.

8. Respect his space and social connections

"Guy time is a necessity. Give him the space he needs to spend time with his buddies."

Honor his need for space. Men often require time alone or with friends to recharge and maintain their sense of self. Respecting this need demonstrates trust and understanding, ultimately strengthening the relationship.

Support his social connections. Encouraging healthy friendships and interests outside the relationship is beneficial:

  • It provides fresh experiences to share
  • Allows for personal growth and identity maintenance
  • Reduces codependency
  • Enhances overall life satisfaction for both partners

By respecting his space and social connections, you create a balanced and trusting partnership.

9. Embrace your role as his emotional sanctuary

"Men WANT to be influenced by the woman they love and adore."

Create emotional safety. Men often struggle to express vulnerability. By creating a judgment-free environment where he feels safe to share his feelings, you become his emotional sanctuary.

Nurture his emotional growth. Support his emotional well-being by:

  • Listening without immediately trying to solve problems
  • Validating his feelings
  • Encouraging healthy emotional expression
  • Being patient as he learns to open up

By embracing this nurturing role, you help your partner develop emotional intelligence and deepen your connection.

10. Recognize the power of your influence

"The future bliss of your relationship partly depends on your ability to support and respect his work."

Understand your impact. Women often have significant influence over their partners' emotional states, decisions, and personal growth. Recognizing this power allows you to use it responsibly and positively.

Use influence wisely. Positively influence your partner by:

  • Offering encouragement and constructive feedback
  • Supporting his personal and professional goals
  • Helping him become the best version of himself
  • Using your insight to navigate challenges together

By recognizing and wielding your influence thoughtfully, you can help shape a fulfilling and harmonious relationship for both partners.

Last updated:

Review Summary

3.82 out of 5
Average of 100+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Readers are divided on "101 Things Your Dad Never Told You About Men". Some praise its honesty and insights into male psychology, finding it helpful for relationships. Others criticize it as sexist, outdated, and promoting subservient behavior in women. Positive reviews appreciate the author's straightforward approach and claim the advice improved their understanding of men. Negative reviews argue the book perpetuates harmful gender stereotypes and offers obvious or common-sense advice. Some readers found it entertaining or humorous, while others deemed it offensive or a waste of time.

Your rating:

About the Author

Bruce Bryans is an author who specializes in writing relationship advice books for both men and women. His primary focus is on helping readers become attractive and indispensable romantic partners to the opposite sex. Bryans' approach is characterized by its directness and lack of pretense, often delivering his advice in a blunt and unapologetic manner. His books aim to provide insights into the psychology of the opposite sex, with the goal of improving readers' romantic relationships. While some readers appreciate his straightforward style, others find his advice controversial or outdated.

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